Thursday, January 28, 2010

Thank you... Thank you very much...

Dear Brittany,

I would like to personally thank you for inhaling me tonight. I have never seen a person look so thrilled to see anything. The smile I brought to your face was all I ever wanted and totally worth it.

I am so grateful to you that I've decided to stick around for a while. I've heard your butt is taking in boarders. I've also spoken with your thighs and they seem hospitable enough. I did swing by your breasts but it was all so crowded and totally not my scene. I'm thinking something more South. Any suggestions?

Love,
The 450 calorie Ice Cream Bar you ate tonight

PS. Just a heads up... If things continue to grow as fast as they have, you might consider asking your breasts to completely stop taking in boarders. I'm sensing some "shifting" of the tectonic plates. And you know that once those suckers shift South... there's no going back. Or up for that matter.

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