Hunger-Mones

Dear Local "Romance" store,

The pheromone sheet spray you sold me is seriously defective. Much to my husbands dismay, it has given me an appetite.... but not for the right thing.

I mean sure.... it puts me in the mood..... for a "cheeseburger". And there lies the problem.

Your "pheromone" sheet spray is full of hungermones. You should look into that.

It's causing major turmoil in my marriage. My husband was a very happy camper when he woke up to me licking his cheek. That was quickly crushed when he realized I was just trying to lick some of the chocolate milk shake off that I had accidently dribbled onto him. Imagine how surprised he was... he didn't even know I was up eating that milkshake at 2 am. It was like being caught red handed with a mistress.

Hungermones. You're ruining my life. I will be returning this sheet spray and I want a full refund.

Love,
Brittany

PS. Would it be so wrong if I secretly kept it in my purse and sniffed it before I went into the buffets? I mean come on! They charge $10 for those things... I want to get my moneys worth..... No?.... Ok fine.